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Q.

Like everything coming from the West, live-in relationships are also considered cool and hip in our society, so much so that couples these days prefer to live with their partners for some time before finally settling for marriage. In marriage, it is believed that married couples make an attempt to compromise and accommodate to each other's life because the marriage is supposed to last for life. Cohabiting couples in LIR don't do this because they don't have a life-long commitment. In a live-in d commitment between two partners is questionable. Do you support Live in relationship ?

Tags: marriage, relationships, health
Asked by sumati gayki, 19 Apr '10 01:09 pm
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Answers (29)

1.

It is better to live in a comfortable live-in relationship knowing full well that one can break off when needed THAN to live in a turbulent, unhappy or violent marriage. Women gain more from a live in relationship - do you know that? You are saved from having a baggage called husband, no meddlesome in laws, no archaic rituals like 'karva chauth' to follow, you are not burdened with kids and neither are you accountable to anyone.
Marriage is for people who wish to get into bondage - good luck to them. You'd probably ask then why did i get married- i got married because in the 1970's no Indian woman could escape marriage.
Answered by joyoti sen, 02 May '10 07:43 am

 
  
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2.

Why live in relationship?this happens when a single girl from a far of place gets a job in a distance place and without her elders to watch out. Ditto for men, they will not realise the consequences of such free sex, chances that they may get all sorts of std/hiv is great in such a relationship, because one cannot exercise any authority over another person like whether he/she should not sleep with others. finally i would like to say no i dont support such relationship. Youngsters may differ with me
Answered by SREENIVAS, 20 Apr '10 04:37 pm

 
  
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3.

In a marriage it is always a compromise and adjustment between both the partners for the happiness/comfort of each other.And I suppose when you believe in 'It is always you before I", only then the real happiness comes in.Care and concern for each other and making efforts for it are the key to the happiness of the family.Also a lifelong realtionship and the children make the couple at ease an=d they enjoy life better.A live in realtionship is quite contrary to it, where the partners look only for self happiness and that too for a short while.What is the fate of such a relationship after a few years? Whennthe couple seperate after a few years ,are there really any further takers for them?What do they do in times of old age or illness or when they really require the mental and emotional support of their partner?I suppose life is too long a journey with many ups and downs and fair weather friends do not last long.And in the absence of any friends is it really possible to go it alone on th ...more
Answered by HEMANT MEHTA, 19 Apr '10 01:17 pm

 
  
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4.

I believe in the institution of marriage if one finds a compatible and right partner. If a couple is not sure if they are right for each other, I feel it is ok for them to try and live in to see if they feel committed enough to each other. Often live in relationships culminate in marriage as a natural progression. Some couple might never get a marriage certificate.....out of personal choice....for as far as they are concerned they are as married as they can be with or without the certificate. In fact often people who are in a live in relationship are more committed to each other than scores of people who are in dead and unhappy marriages, who keep up a pretense for the sake of the children and to appease a society which neither understand nor care ( even if they understand). For most people if they are in a fairly workable marriage turn a blind and deaf to travails of people in such situations in the name of maintaining something called decorum. What the society has to wake up to is ...more
Answered by blue ocean, 17 May '10 12:18 pm

 
  
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5.

Instead of a treatise on this oft asked question...I would just point out that the institution of marriage is very sacred...that the mantras and the rituals of marriage amongst Hindus are meant to cleanse our souls and help us embark on the pious journey of marriage----with a level of sharing and caring which overwhelms all empty professions of Love.
But the scene today is changed-neither do we have the Brahmins who can perform the rituals or utter mantras correctly...neither do we have the level of sincerity / understanding amongst the couples undergoing this.
I would find nothing wrong in LIR's because ...
1. one is not forced into it and gets into by own choice.
2. that commitments are kept more in LIR's than marriages nowadays...where each partner starts taking the other for granted.
3. That one is not forced to continue in a violent and unhappy partnership because of some the misconception surrounding marriage.
4. That most of these LIR's end up with a commitment or marriage ...more
Answered by prasoon, 17 May '10 03:29 pm

 
  
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6.

Supporting LIR or not is not going to serve any purpose at all....each of us are always vulnerable to changes and these changes are taking place, no doubt abt it...one dayers are threatened to affect the test matches, then T-20 are said to diminish the charm of one dayers as well....but nothing changed...rather enjoying more all the three version of the game...if we look at the Constituition of a Nation, or any voluminous act...I often wonder wrt the fact that how can we feel free(which happens to be a birth right)....but...but...we feel free following all these...if u r not certain that whether u shall have a dinner wid someone late in the evening or not, whether somebody shall be waiting for u back home or not....u see , wid d effort of several thousand years, we cud settle ourselves to a greater extent(overlooking the shortcomings in each of the aspects of our lives) and now suddenly we are supposed to change it within a few years or decades or say within span of a century...its not ...more
Answered by bijoy agarwala, 16 May '10 08:54 pm

 
  
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7.

I will not support it
and feel IN INDIA it is more heard of than actually existing
Answered by anil garg, 10 May '10 11:23 pm

 
  
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8.

This is step by step relationship ,so we have such procedures in exixting relationship we call it as engagements.otherwise why it is required.what we need to know what is existing practice, why it is decided.in my opinion you will get answers in that.only some who has not understood the importance of relationships and time or other priorities they may prefer what you say.
Answered by vilas manohar deshpande, 10 May '10 01:30 pm

 
  
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9.

Live in relationships existed in Ancient India, have u heard of the COMMON HOME in Harappan culture? IT consisted of folks, men and women, who were single...but had seasonal jobs, unsteady income, frequent travel, military life etc.

U say marriage is about accomodation eh? Welcome to capitalism.

What if I am a Mastheri (Mason) and I work only 4 months out of 12? What if I run a puncture shop and I get business only on summers? Ok, u r gonna say "Save from those 4 months".....OK, so if I make 40,000 Rupees in those 4 months, then for the year it is 3333.33 Rupees per month, if u allocate it per month. So far so good...but then....MEDICAL EMERGENCY! 2 lakh needed for daughter's operation! Where to go?! Where to go?! Banks won't cooperate since for the majority of the year, my business is dull and only picks up on seasons (as a Mesthri for ex but there are zillions such professions in capitalist world).

Or what about a case where the husband is required to travel extensively a ...more
Answered by A Moin, 02 May '10 07:25 am

 
  
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10.

Life long commitment culminates them to go for compromise and adjustment
Answered by jameel ahmed, 30 Apr '10 04:55 pm

 
  
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